Last Activity: 01-08-2016
Well well well...
It's been about 7 or 8 years...
Long enough for me to lose track of my username's email and login for Pino. I found this one though haha
I have some very unusual updates for you all...
Let me take you back to Summer 2015....
I took a lot of pride and humor in this car, it ended up looking great, but it wasn't the reason I fell in love with Volvo 240s. The green one my ex girlfriend had was the genesis of my appreciation. That one just felt so incredibly well built and smooth, whereas this example was kinda rough and tractor-like. That was fine with me though because of its utility and reliability. I put that first. It was my really beautiful elongated tractor.
Not many other people liked it though to be honest. Friends, coworkers, etc all thought I was weird for liking the thing. Lots of scoffs and jokes from people under 60yrs old. I worked at Harley-Davidson of Baltimore at the time and the overlap of Harley & Volvo is zero. No one was more ruthless than my friend Luke. He's got a killer sense of humor and quite the mouth, so I was more than happy to give him the keys one day for a laugh. I told him "ya can't hurt it..."
Luke didn't hold back with his brother and I in the car. It was a rather violent and jerky experience, but I thought the car could take it. They said they're indestructible, right? Well I thought my brick proved that theory on this day because we got home and everything seemed fine. Most importantly, everyone had a good laugh, and that's part of what driving old cars should be about. Mission accomplished.
On that same day, our Aztec "death whistles" came in the mail from Etsy. Took months. We had largely forgotten about them. Handcrafted in south america, seemingly as authentic as you can get these days. We heard of its lure and some youtube videos and thought it would be funny to buy.
I remember opening the weird DHL box in my friend's kitchen. His mom walked in, a rather superstitious and spiritual person, and wasn't all that entertained. "Don't you dare blow that inside my house!" she scolded. I laughed. I get it. Her house. So on the next day, as I say my goodbyes and head out the door with my whistle. I go to blow it, After all, i'm outside her house now!... "Don't you fucking dare blow that within 100 yards of my home" she exclaimed.
I obliged.So I'm 10mins down the highway, on a nice calm uphill at 60mph with no one around. I suddenly look on my passenger seat and remember the whistle, and the fact that I still haven't heard it. I was so curious! And now was my moment!
SKREEEEEETTTCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
What an awful and piercing sound. I can't imagine 1000+ of them at once. Horrifying.
.....
BANG RRATTLEEE RATTLE RATTLE!
Many of you will call bullshit, and I totally get where you're coming from. I'd be skeptical too. I myself don't know how to process this. But I swear on my own mother's life and all that is holy that within 10 seconds of blowing my Aztec Death Whistle, my motor exploded. Total catastrophic failure. I'm talkin hole-in-the-motor kinda explosion. Vehicle damage aside, that moment changed me on a fundamental and spiritual level. Something like that isn't just some random coincidence. That was plainly the ancient curse in action. I experienced it with my own eyes ears and wallet.
*Terrible side note, but it's worth mentioning... I ended up getting even more disturbed by that whistle. I hated my apartment building at that time and had especially hostile neighbors. I remember blowing it outside my bedroom window after one of our awful HOA meetings and burying it in the back top shelf of my closet. I started renting another place to avoid the situation altogether, but still owned the apartment. Within 6 months of blowing that whistle, the unit neighbors that slept 10ft above and below that closet unexpectedly passed away and the co-op HOA board fell apart and was converted into private units. That wasn't as blatantly tied to the whistle as my 240 motor, but it happened. Make of that what you will, and I don't suggest you buy an aztec death whistle.
Back to the car. I was towed to my shop where they confirmed the news - my motor literally exploded. My mechanic at the time was extremely familiar with these cars and had never seen anything like it in his life. I've heard of some motors exploding like old american V8s or STi's or something, but never a redblock. I thought that was as improbable as a failed Land Cruiser or fork.
It wasn't until last month in 2023 that I saw a comparable explosion on YouTube with the same noise and exploded shrapnel in the engine. The explosion is halfway thru, and the shrapnel pieces are at the end in his explanation:
My wagon then underwent a rather expensive and time consuming motorswap at my shop. Something like $1500-$2k total. By the end of that ordeal, I had totally lost interest in continuing this experience. I sold it for $4k on craigslist in the matter of a couple days to a nice family man. I gave him $100 back for good karma and told him to take his wife out that night in it for dinner. That was the last I ever saw of her. I was so emphatically disenchanted and creeped out that I bought my first new vehicle ever, a 2016 4cyl 5spd manual tacoma. Only made em for a couple years and it woulda been one hell of an example to keep, but those days are long behind me as well.
This isn't why I'm back though.
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- excellent with this paint code!